StevenMiyao

The behaviors that got you here, the control, the drive, the need to be the one with the answers, didn't just become habits. They became how you understand your own value. So when something asks you to let go of them, it doesn't feel inefficient. It feels like a threat to who you are.

I've been noticing something in myself lately, and I wonder if it's true for you too. My days are full. Work, kids, aging parents, and the constant demand for everything that needs attention. I'm rarely alone. And yet, something's missing. I think it might be loneliness. Not the kind where no one's around. The kind where you're surrounded by people but not really with any of them.

That response is cortisol—a hormone designed to help us escape predators. Tens of thousands of years ago, when a sabertooth tiger chased us, cortisol flooded our system, shutting down digestion, immune function, and anything else that wasn't essential for survival. The system was built for threats that resolve in minutes. When cortisol stays elevated for months, it stops protecting us and starts breaking us down.